First, let me say I have NO freaking idea what I'm doing LOL. No, seriously. This is my first ever blog, and my first ever post. I think I titled my blog page what the title of this entry is. No idea how to fix it. Anyway, let me give a little intro, and a TINY back story. I say tiny, because I would take up your next 3 Christmas telling you how we got to where we are..
I'm married to my life long friend. We have 3 children. 2 boys, (6), and (21 months) and a little girl, (6 months). My husband and I have known each other our whole lives, but lost touch for about 8 years, then were reunited via Myspace, and also the Army because he was stationed close to me. We've been together since the first time he visited me after so many years between.
Sounds like a fairy tail right? Except for the part that we've hardly been together since we became a couple. He was still in AIT then. He'd visit when he had some leave built up, and I went up twice to see him. Then when he got to his first duty station, he got orders for his first deployment. We planned on getting married really soon after he got there, then I'd move up a few months later, but we rushed it since he had gotten the orders. He had a ton of training, then his deployment. We had son during that deployment.. Then he came home, we got pregnant again, and he deployed... It's been.. Tough to say the least. We're hoping when he gets home from this deployment, we will have a little bit of a break, to finally be a family.
I get pretty tired of holding it all together. Yes, it's my job, and I do it.. But I do get sick of being without him. It's so hard to watch the kids go through missing their daddy.. And our poor little girl, she doesn't even know the difference. She's missing having that other parent to snuggle with her, and kiss her goodnight. It's just heart breaking. I have a hard enough time missing my best friend/husband.. But seeing our kids go through it really just shatters my heart.
Anyway.. This is just my intro. My initial, "Hi".. I plan to use this blog as my outlet. To get off my chest how I'm feeling, without the fear of being judged, criticized, or having the "I have it worse" game to play. This blog will be full of all the things I just can't muster up the courage to really say out loud. I hope this will help me to deal with missing my husband so much, and help me get through these days faster, with a lot less weight on my shoulders.
